


A Shit-Hot Housewife

by morganascorpse



Category: Arctic Monkeys, Last Shadow Puppets
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:01:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28481334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morganascorpse/pseuds/morganascorpse
Summary: you have a very upsetting day but Nick is there cooking for you and comforting you and love and affection vfhsjfejisfjierjaoei
Relationships: Nick O'Malley/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	A Shit-Hot Housewife

People had been letting you down quite a lot recently, and you felt like you could do nothing about it. It was really fucking frustrating feeling like people were never willing to meet you halfway and that, despite your best efforts to fix things, people just couldn’t be arsed.  
But your life wasn’t total shit. You had started dating Nick O’Malley a few months ago, and he was a total sweetheart to you. He was funny, had his romantic moments and he seemed just as eager to spend time with you as you were with him, something that had been lacking for several years in your life.  
You did enjoy Arctic Monkeys before, but you weren’t obsessed with them, so when you and Nick met by chance at a bar you weren’t nervous or starstruck at all, which would’ve certainly drove him away.  
You were slowly walking back home after meeting a friend that was giving you one hell of a headache with their behavior. You loved them dearly, but now they seemed like a completely different person and the situation had drained almost all your vitality. You had to stop at least four times to just breathe and try to find the strength to get back home, not even thinking about how hungry you were or if you’d be able to draw a bath before throwing yourself on the sofa and dying.  
After what felt like forever, you were standing before your front door, finding it difficult to hold the keys properly. After a bit of fumbling, you managed to unlock the door and drag yourself inside.  
Before you could freak out about noises coming from your kitchen, you were surprised to hear Nick’s deep voice:  
“(Y/n), love? I’m here.”  
“Hey Nick…” you answered in a weak voice after sighing deeply, sitting on the floor to untie your shoes and kick them from your feet. You noticed that something smelled amazing, Nick must’ve been cooking something, and you felt a small smile creep up your lips. Closing the door, you sighed again before walking to the kitchen.  
“What are you doing?” you asked softly, smiling at him while getting closer.  
“You told me you were gonna have a rough day, and you left the spare keys you had done at my house the other night, so… thought I might surprise you.” He said the last part with a nervous laugh, avoiding your eyes, probably in case you found it weird.  
Nick was so different from everyone you had been dealing with recently, he was doing all this just for you, you were overwhelmed with love and found it impossible to remain not touching him for a second longer. You gave him a wide smile before walking over to him and hugging him from behind, your hands resting on top of his tummy and your head on his shoulder. His warmth was comforting and inviting and you breathed in deeply. Even though he had been standing in front of the pans, his clothes catching all the different scents from the food, he still smelled like him and it was amazing.  
“How was it, love?” he seemed relieved that you appreciated his presence, resuming his chopping of some sort of mushrooms, but you could still feel that you had his full attention.  
“Bad. Didn’t solve anything.” You pressed yourself to his back further, needing the comfort. “It’s so fucking frustrating when you have been raised all your life to believe that dialogue can always fix problems but it feels like it has never worked, not even once.”  
Nick stopped chopping again to touch your hand, turning his head to kiss your temple. You kissed his neck lovingly, nuzzling into it and not wanting to move ever again for all eternity.  
“That sucks, (Y/n). You are such a sweet person, you don’t deserve to only have met these scummy people all your life.” Your boyfriend uttered, his words slightly muffled by his lips pressing against your forehead.  
“I think my streak of bad luck might be over though.” You answered in the blink of an eye, too tired to discuss the billion nuances of the your friend situation and wanting to compliment the beautiful gift the universe had given you.  
In response, Nick gently laid his head on top of yours, breathing in the scent of your hair, and you could feel him smiling against your scalp. After a moment like this, he said:  
“I’m not trying to say that you smell, but how about I draw us a bath after I’m done here?”  
“oH rEaLLY???” you laughed, pinching his sides and making him jump and let out a weird squeal. The bassist turned around in your arms and started laughing with you while you stared at each other lovingly. Nick held your face and went for a kiss, but you both laughed at the same time so your teeth clanked painfully against one another, making you both stumble backwards covering your mouths and exclaiming Ah s and Ouch s but still laughing.  
“You’re an angel, Nick.” You said, reaching over to brush one of his curls behind his ear, him turning his head to kiss your palm. He made you so happy you felt like you were about to explode.  
You laid down on the floor while he finished putting whatever he was doing on the oven, pans, seasoning things, etc.  
“How was your day?” you asked the bassist, staring at the ceiling.  
“Hmm, the usual. Rehearsals.”  
“You know I like hearing about the dumb shit you guys get up to.” You insisted, laughing at the thought of the other daily shenanigans Nick had narrated to you. These guys really gave you hope in friendship.  
“Well, Matt showed up in crocs today.”  
“You guys having terrible fashion sense isn’t really a surprise. I mean, Alex wears espadrilles.” Nick chuckled at your comment.  
“Well yeah, but at least espadrilles are comfortable.”  
“Allegedly.”  
“More comfortable than rubber shoes at least! But the thing is, Matt found out that it’s extremely difficult to play wearing those. He couldn’t stop complaining about it, he even tried to steal my shoes!”  
“Well, that’ll teach him a lesson. Don’t give the Evil Croc money.”  
Nick started having a laughter fit, he wasn’t expecting The Evil Croc™ comment.  
“Put the knife down, O’Malley!” you said laughing as well, not wanting him to get hurt. He put it down and leaned on the kitchen counter, still laughing hysterically. Once your boyfriend had calmed down, he started speaking again.   
“Alex was sick of it-“ he laughed a bit more, then got a hold of himself. “Alex was sick of it, so he tried making that crocodile head eat the crocs.”  
“The Good Croc-“ “The Good Croc, if you will-“ you said at the same time, laughter filling the room once again because of your synchronicity.   
“Ok, I’m done here.”  
Nick held out his hand to help you get off the floor and you took it, him losing his balance a little bit when you pulled on his arm to get up, and you getting lightheaded since you got up too fast.  
“I used to have yellow crocs. I thought they were the most fashion forward thing in the world.” You said as you stumbled into your bathroom and the bassist reached out to get the water running.  
“Oh my God…” he said smiling and shaking his head, kneeling next to the tub and opening the sink cabinet to grab a bath bomb. You sat down on the toilet seat, too tired to stay up on your feet even for a couple of seconds. “I mean, I can’t really judge, I used to think dad sandals were extremely fashion forward.”  
“Jesus Mary and Joseph get out of my house!” you exclaimed, laughter deforming your words a bit.  
You instinctively reached out to lay your palm on his back, feeling a sudden urge to touch him, just to feel him and his warmth, a feeling you couldn’t and wouldn’t ignore just because you could come off as sort of weird. He smiled back at you and laid his head on your knee while you waited for the bathtub to fill up.  
You sighed heavily, curling into a c to kiss your boyfriend’s cheek, staying like that for a few seconds. He turned his head and gave you a quick peck, immediately standing up as if he suddenly remembered something.   
“Gonna brush my teeth, I wanna kiss you a lot and I probably taste like every seasoning ever.” He clarified before you could ask anything. You stood up and also grabbed your toothbrush.  
“Good idea, I probably taste like bitterness and hopelessness.”  
He passed you the toothpaste and wrapped his arm around your shoulders, holding you close. When you set the paste back on the sink you hugged his waist and you both rocked back and forth while brushing your teeth, staring at the already completely fogged mirror.  
The warmth from the bath and from Nick was making you drowsy again, barely having the energy to continue moving the brush up and down. You almost lost your balance when Nick let go of you to spit the toothpaste and close the tap, the bathtub already full, pink and glittery due to the bathbomb. You did the same and started to shed your clothes and let them drop carelessly on the floor, Nick following you. When he was just in his underwear, your hand had a life of its own and slapped his ass, making him jump and chuckle (and blush. He had his back facing you but you know he did).  
You both finally stepped into the tub, you were going to sit across from him but your boyfriend motioned for you to sit between his legs and you obliged, sighing at the feeling of the warm water surrounding you.  
Nick’s hands came up to gently brush your hair to the side and lightly massage your back, his calloused fingers working on the tense knots. You dropped your head to your knees, feeling like you could finally relax. He dropped body wash on his hands and rubbed your shoulders and neck slowly, coaxing a low hum of approval from you.  
You sighed for the billionth time today and started a rant:  
"It's really draining, you know? When you feel like... When you're doing everything you can, literally everything, but things just. Don't work. It fucking sucks. How can people change so much for the worse in so little time?"  
Hands slid down your arms as the bassist pressed a gentle kiss to your spine, saying:  
“I know love. I know nothing I say will fix it, but I see you and I appreciate you. We’ll eat dinner and watch some silly cartoons and cuddle on the couch and everything will be fine, ok? Anything that happens was meant to happen, so don’t worry so much. Just… I see you, okay?” you nodded in response. You knew exactly what he meant, and that meant so much to you.  
His hands came back up your arms, down your shoulders, brushing against your ribs and making you jump. You looked back at him in fake annoyance, he knew you were ticklish.  
“Sorry.” Nick said, trying to contain his smile.  
You lazily turned to face him, stretching your legs and wrapping your arms around his neck, your side pressed against his front. You didn’t feel like ranting anymore, not just because you were incredibly tired, but also because you felt that Nick understood everything. You didn’t need to go into crazy detail about your feelings, he just knew.  
“What are you cooking, by the by?” you asked, remembering that you still had no idea what you were going to have for dinner.  
“Chicken stroganoff, you said it was your favorite when we started dating, I think? I wasn’t very familiar with the dish, I hope it’s alright…” he trailed off because he noticed your eyes were glimmering.  
“You remembered…?” you were about to cry. You usually weren’t like that but y’know, emotional exhaustion.  
“Aww love… don’t cry, obviously I remember.” He tightened his grip on you, holding you impossibly close. “That’s the sorta thing you keep in mind when you really like someone.”  
You were beaming, on the brink of tears. You cupped his face and pulled him in for a kiss.  
“You’re a dream…” you whispered against his lips, closing in the distance before he could reverse uno card the situation.   
Your lips moved in sync, pouring all your love and adoration for each other into the action, Nick’s hand moving slowly up and down your back until it settled on your waist, the other going to the back of your neck to deepen the kiss. Your hands were tracing his cheekbones and jawline softly, moving to twirl his curls and scratch his scalp lightly. Your tongues danced together and there was no fight, only softness and understanding.  
After a while you were out of breath, pushing on the bassist’s shoulder slightly to break the kiss. You were still fighting the tears, you were feeling so many wonderful things at once you didn’t know if there were enough words to describe it, but you knew Nick felt them too.  
Your boyfriend was still cupping the back of your head, holding you close, his eyes fluttering open after a few seconds. They were so blue and full of life, you were mesmerized.  
“You are my dream…” you muttered, still lost in a daze.  
“And you are mine…” Nick answered, not skipping a beat.  
You stared at each other for a few more seconds before your brain started working normally again.  
“Isn’t- isn’t that from a movie?” you asked with a half smile, that exchange sounding rather familiar.  
“Hmmm don’t care, love. We’re already in a masterpiece of a movie, no second takes needed.” With that, the bassist brought your face close to his again, kissing all over your eyelids, forehead, nose, cheeks, anywhere he could reach.  
You were going to make fun of him for being extremely cheesy, but you said he was your dream first. You had no cheesy moral high ground.  
Between giggles, you pushed him away, picking up the shampoo bottle.  
“C’mon O’Malley, I don’t wanna stay in this tub forever, I’m starving.” You squeezed the shampoo in your hand while making a half hearted attempt at evading Nick’s love, but soon he let you go. He had a huge smile on his lips when he took the bottle from your hands, applying a bit to his own hair.  
You fell into a comfortable silence, grabbing the bath puffs, soaking them and rubbing the bar of soap in them before scrubbing each other’s neck and chest, repeating the process for other body parts.  
Recently you didn’t really have the time to take baths, always resorting to quick showers, so you had forgotten how difficult it was to maneuver yourself inside of a tub, especially with someone else there. You were bumping and kicking each other all the time, but it was fun in a way, and nothing could wipe the lovestruck smiles from your faces. Sometimes you even forgot to playfully pretend to be annoyed by Nick’s pushes.  
After a while you were staring at the side of the tub, trying to convince yourself to get up and dry yourself up, so you could slip into pajamas and eat and crash into your bed.  
“What are you thinking about, love?” your boyfriend asked, and you took a while to come back down to Earth and respond.  
“Hmnmmnmn. Carry me?” you pleaded, resting your hands on his shoulders while he chuckled.  
“I’m not quite there yet, (Y/n). I can help you up though.”  
With that, Nick slowly got out of the tub, holding his hands out for you to take a hold of. You took them and slowly got up, careful as to not slip and fall. Your boyfriend reached behind you and pulled on the drain stopper while you grabbed the comically huge towels you had gotten a few months ago, handing one to Nick and wrapping the other around yourself.  
“(Y/n), I do love these towels. Makes me feel like a child again.” The bassist commented while he followed you out of the bathroom.  
“Yeah, me too. I didn’t really think through the whole washing them is a pain in the ass part when I bought them, though.”  
“Hmmm yeah, wouldn’t want to be you.” He playfully pushed his nose against your cheek, making you smile.  
You both left wet footprints on your way to the bedroom, you sitting down immediately on your bed because at this point you couldn’t go more than 20 seconds without something supporting you. Thankfully Nick picked up on it and went through your drawers, handing you your pajamas a few seconds later.  
“Here, darling.” He then turned his back to you again to find a few of his own clothes that he had left at your place.  
“Thanks, babe…” your voice trailed off into a sigh while you pulled the towel up to dry your hair up a bit.  
While you were putting your clothes on, your stomach growled, begging to be fed. You really didn’t expect the conversation with your friend to go on for so long.  
You got up and Nick wrapped an arm around your waist, you both walking down the hallway again, your boyfriend basically your crutch at this point of exhaustion, if not the whole goddamn wheelchair.  
“Foooooooooood…” you growled like the gargoyle you felt like, and Nick set you down on your couch.  
“I’ll bring your food in a bit, you little monster. Hang in there.”  
After the bassist walked away you started hearing metal noises coming from the kitchen, and you did hungry monster noises to mess with Nick for like two seconds before you just melted into your comfy sofa. You were afraid you were so tired at this point that Nick would have to feed you.  
Your gaze wondered to the shelf that sat above your TV, where you kept framed pictures, little trinkets and ornaments. You spotted some pretty stones that you spent way too much money on because you were going out with someone who was obsessed with them. It was funny, at the time you thought that life was so complicated, but thinking back it was nothing compared to now.  
You continued looking through your shelf, until your eyes met a photo of you and your friend. You were twelve at the most, smiling at the camera with your awkward frames. You sighed, thinking back to that time when you were conjoined by the hip, nothing ever got in between the two of you. You remember making plans to, when you died, haunt the same house that was just in the end of your street. You wished you could go back, even if just for a day, to those simple, silly times.  
“Here, love.”  
Nick appeared out of nowhere with two dishes of chicken stroganoff and rice, startling you a bit. He chuckled and waited for you to get in a comfortable position to place the plate on top of a pillow, set his own dish next to you on the sofa and went back to the kitchen for a second, bringing two cups of orange juice.  
“Thank you, babe…” you took the cup from his hand, balancing it on the arm of the sofa.  
“No problem, (Y/n). You wanna watch some TV?” he got on a position identical to yours on the other end of the couch.  
“Hmmm…” you took a sip of your juice before continuing. “What’s on on History Channel?”  
“I’m warning you,” Nick started in a playful tone as he turned the TV on “if it’s Pawn Stars, we’re not watching it.”   
You cackled loudly, throwing you head back, making the liquid inside your cup slosh dangerously.  
“Obviously.” The end of the word got lost as you started eating your meal as Nick went through channel after channel, never being able to remember the number. While browsing, he went through Channel 4, and you realized that ‘SAS: Who Dares Wins’ was on.  
“Wait wait wait, go back!” you exclaimed, waving your hand to the television. “Yeah, you ok with show?”  
“Yeah, it’s nice enough.”  
This program was very relaxing for you, it was full of earthy tones and people just. Being real. Sometimes the upbeatness and cheerfulness of most TV shows were exhausting.   
You ate in silence, letting your mind go blank and your body to go on autopilot. Honestly you couldn’t even give your boyfriend feedback on his cooking because you were so hungry you pretty much vacuum cleaned your plane in like ten minutes. There was a mini debate in your head about ‘do I get up to take my dish to the sink and get chocolate or do I let Nick do it for me’ but you felt a little guilty that he was doing absolutely everything, so you gathered up the energy to do just that, crashing back on the couch (right next to the bassist this time) with one of those Hershey’s Ovaltine bars.  
As you ripped the wrapper and Nick finished his meal, your mind started to wander again. You looked at your boyfriend, his beautiful profile, his curly hair, you felt like your heart was exploding from the intensity of your feelings. What the two of you had was so solid, so stable and… real. But then again when you and your friend were younger you thought you were all of that. Your brain was being filled up quickly with half baked thoughts about forever, so you stopped yourself from dwelling on the subject much further. You were doing your absolute best and whatever happens, happens.  
You were brought back to reality by Nick getting up to put his dish away, quickly coming back to the sofa and wrapping an arm around you. You scooted closer to him, automatically feeding him a square of chocolate. He tried to playfully bite your finger, causing a tired giggle to bubble from you.  
You rested your head on the back of the couch, Nick’s shoulder supporting your neck, and watched his face closely. He looked back at you, his bright eyes stared deep into your soul before he closed them and leaned in for a kiss. You smiled into it, everything was so warm and nice, you reached for Nick’s hand on your arm, giving it a squeeze and holding his fingers.  
You two continued eating the chocolate, you were paying no mind to the TV, until Nick pointed at it and asked:  
“How would you do in that test?”  
It took you a while to realize that he was talking about the show. The test in question was all about trust, trusting the instructors and just crossing your arms over your chest and falling back into the water.  
“I think I’d do well. I mean, if someone who has done this a billion times says that it’ll be fine I don’t think I’d have a problem just. Falling. You?”  
“Wait. Do you know how to swim?”  
“…no…”  
Nick let out a loud cackle, that turning into an uncontrollable laughing fit.  
“No, wait, Nick, wait, listen-“ you started laughing too, thinking about the ridiculousness of what you said.  
“hOW WOULD YOU DO WELL IF YOU CAN’T SWIM??? OH MY GOD I-“  
The laughter went on for a while from both of you, after which your boyfriend managed to catch his breath and wipe the tears from the corners of his eyes.  
“Okay Nicholas Edward, listen. If I was on that show, I’d know how to swim. I think it’s a requirement to be on? So in the universe where I am remotely fit to be in a fucking Special Air Service selection simulation, I’d know how to swim, and I’d well, got it?”  
“Yeah… okay…” a few more giggles escaped Nick before he guided your head back to rest on his shoulder, kissing the top of it.  
You let yourself melt into Nick, the smile still tugging at your lips slowly fading as your muscles relaxed. You breathed in and you felt really emotional when you felt Nick’s scent mixed with your own, this happened every time he took a shower at your place. It could be a really beautiful metaphor some other time when you would be mentally capable of processing it. Right now all your brain was telling you was Love. Love and adoration surrounded you and you just wanted to live in that moment forever.  
You looked out the window, noticing the outside world for the first time in quite some time. The sky was of a dark iron color, surely you were due to a storm. You could only see the outlines of things in your living room now and the chill from outside was creeping in, making you wrap your arms around your boyfriend and cuddle closer to him, letting out a short sigh. His slow rubs up and down your back, sometimes stopping to lightly massage your neck felt like heaven.  
“Do you wanna go to bed, love?” Nick said very softly, his deep voice so warm and loving.  
You could only ‘hhhnnnn’ in response. You knew that it would be better for your back but the amount of effort needed to brush your teeth and walk to your bed seemed beyond herculean at this point.  
“C’mon…” Nick whispered with a soft chuckle, moving to get up and you ‘hhhnnnn’d at him again, not having the strength to hold him down. “I’ll bring you your toothbrush, okay?”  
You gave him the faintest nod and he quickly took your hand and kissed it before rushing to the bathroom, almost instantly coming back with your toothbrush plus toothpaste and brushing his own teeth.  
You looked at his extended hand and just opened your mouth instead.  
This made Nick laugh out loud, looking up at the ceiling so that the toothpaste that dripped down his chin wouldn’t hit the floor, still trying to hand you the toothbrush.   
“(Y/n), c’mon!” you managed to understand these word in between gurgled laughs and decided that it would be the last push and then you’d be able to sleep for sixteen hours straight. You started brushing your teeth and walked surprisingly fast to the bathroom, managing to only hit a wall once. You also managed to get startled when Nick appeared behind you on the mirror and choke on toothpaste because of it, while your boyfriend laughed while spitting the paste and lightly slapping your back to help.  
After you almost walked into the doorframe, the bassist took a hold of your shoulders (still laughing) and guided you to the bedroom. The covers weren’t on top of the mattress so you just plopped down on it, waiting for your boyfriend to cover you.  
“There, now you won’t assault anymore walls.” You could still hear the laughter in his voice, and you couldn’t help but smile too, turning to lay on your back.   
Nick was rummaging through your wardrobe, trying to decide which blanket would be the most appropriate for the weather.  
“Get the green one and get over here already, M’alley.” You interjected, knowing all your blankets very well.  
“Sir yes sir.” Nick answered playfully, grabbing the green one as you instructed and laying it over you. He walked around the bed, closing the blinds and turning the lights off before getting under the covers with you.  
At this point, you were so tired you felt that even breathing in and out was a chore. You and Nick were on your sides, facing each other and you could barely see the outlines of his curls against the darkness, but you felt when he laid his hand gently on top of yours.  
“Thank you, angel…” you blurted out without thinking, already drifting off.  
Nick took a moment to respond:  
“Anything for you, my love…”


End file.
